you must read Lukáš's 1st Adventure.
Read? Then you're ready for testing.
Czech
Plush Monkey's Adventures! |
Monkey sees and does
stuff. |
|
Before
you take this test, you must read Lukáš's 1st Adventure. Read? Then you're ready for testing. |
|
How
Czechard is your memory? A whimsical test. |
| If you wish to take this test "open book" by flipping back and forth between Lukáš's story and the test--go ahead. If you prefer to cheat, answers are provided at page bottom. We do not claim they are the right answers, nor that every answer appears in the original text. In any case your confidentiality is assured, as you never submit your answers or score to Monkey. In fact, like so many learning experiences, this is a dead end. Back away or begin. Czech all or any or none that apply: |
| # 1. What started
all this? a) Monkey was fresh out of Czechs. b) Monkey is an adventure antagonist. c) Monkey sees and duz stuff without reason. d) Most likely pretty much because. |
| # 2. When
Opice stubbed his toe he... a) Blamed everyone else, of course. b) Invented a hop/limp dance to show he meant to do that. c) Pouted. d) Accidentally set off an interminably long webpage. |
| # 3. Who's
the victim here? a) You, the reader. b) Me, the narrator. c) Lukáš and/or Antonín Dvořák d) The English, Czech, and Hawaiian languages. |
| # 4. The
Adventure really begins at... a) Putah Creek where 49ers hoped to flood a brothel. b) Lake Berryessa's Glory Hole (but that's quite another story). c) about 9:37 AM PDT. d) the next stop because Lukey saw no eagles. |
| # 5. Which
one's better? a) Calistoga's Old Faithful Geyser or Karlovy Vary's Gejzír. b) Monkey's occasional eruptions or Lukáš's constant bewilderment. c) The origins of Calistoga's name or St. hell-LEEN-ah's. d) Stoned trees or Xtreme wine tasting. |
| # 6. Tessellation
is to Tesserae as Corison Winery is to... a) "Cabernet Sauvignon without compromise." b) Beringer, only way better. c) Recommended parks and libation. d) Are you sure those "tesse..." words are words? |
| # 7. What
did Lukey miss? a) guided. b) an escape pod. c) the Highway 12 driving experience. d) not the Jelly Belly robots--no way! |
| # 8. The
best free things in life on this trip were? a) Old Faithful and the Petrified forest cuz Lukáš paid. b) Armstrong Woods because it was Monkey-free. c) belly-flops d) Monkey's bizarre associations. |
| # 9. What
did Lukáš admit when asked about Antonín Dvořák? a) He'll fail to teach his son to play guitar leading to Anton's decent into symphonia. b) His girlfriend had better take precautions. <== hint hint! c) He couldn't out-fox Monkey. d) He was decomposing. |
| # 10. Which
place did Monkey like best? a) Davis, California b) Lukey in his place. c) Sitting in the fountain. d) Snack stop, lunch stop, wine stop, belly-flop and ice-cream stop. |
Calculating how much you owe Opice for the knowledge: 1-c, 2-d, 3-at least all, 4-c, 5-b, 6-a, 7-b, 8-d, 9-b!, 10-d |
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Award yourself 50 points (out of 100) for taking the test. Add 5 points for each correct answer. (You may change your answers as needed. We're not looking.) |
| If you scored 50 points: | Opice confused you, didn't he? You owe 50¢ |
| If you scored 55-75 points: | you need more Czech 'Brain Food' in your diet (a.k.a. beer). 75¢ |
| If you scored 76-99 points: | amazing! How'd you do that when points are measured in 5s?! 76.9¢ |
| If you scored 100 points: | you should be Monkey's next victim! Free Association! |
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